90 Minutes in Heaven

90 Minutes in Heaven

Don Piper’s 2004 best selling memoir, “90 Minutes in Heaven,” is the first film ever made for it. The film only lasts for about three minutes as he experiences life after death and when it finally happens it doesn’t deliver on its promise. A better title could have been “121 Minutes in Purgatory” since much of this tiresome journey down the well-meaning but familiar path equates to a boring trip to hell.

The saddest thing is that such a premise could have been an awesome movie. This is a story about a Baptist preacher who dies terribly in an accident, goes to heaven and resurrects back with a pastor singing the lyrics of his hymn at his bloody body. However, Piper became so obsessed with this version of paradise that he lost interest in going back towards recovery. He ignored family and friends along with all their good deeds which he used to render daily to assist those who were needy.

An actor playing Piper should be able to let viewers into his emotional fight whereas being trapped in bed at the same time. The first fatal mistake of this movie was casting Hayden Christensen. For instance, just like he did as Anakin Skywalker, mistook himself by pouty looks and muttered script delivery for rich outlines of character development; beginning from frame one Christensen is constantly annoying viewer presence.

As Billy Ray’s brilliant 2003 portrait of a dishonest journalist called Shattered Glass proves convincingly, if we look carefully at his entire career there are reasons why Christensen remains best known actor (he plays fake parts very well). In difficult circumstances sincerity gets harder for him; this major issues including absence thereof make cause the person assigned to him frequently saying repeatedly that ‘Heaven is Real!’

If you think that sounds like something you’ve heard before then maybe you saw last year’s highest grossing evangelical release Heaven Is For Real which was infinitely better than this film on every level. This movie also told a true story of a near-death experience, but it was far more willing to explore the resulting spiritual crises and doubts. “90 Minutes in Heaven” presumes an audience that will accept Piper’s claims without question, hence doesn’t pretend to try making them believable or even engaging.

Just imagine the unlimited possibilities for these filmmakers with regard to using visual art in creating scenes that Piper witnessed after his soul left him. Apart from increasing the aspect ratio, director and writer Michael Polish once applauded for daring fables like “Northfork” has nothing more than sunlit green screen shots of happy white people in their Sunday best. The rest are two black women and an Asian guy, but they are just extras who showed up to pose for a celestial photo op.

Another problem is the dialogue. Every time someone arrives into the story Piper’s voice over narration tends to give out details about that person’s godly virtues (like military service) even when it is not relevant to the narrative. He also brings unwelcome attention to the film’s obvious metaphors by literally spelling them out via voice-over. After a brief spat with his wife, Eva (Kate Bosworth), she gazes forlornly at fireworks exploding out his hospital window. “Unfortunately,” Don moans, “these were the only fireworks left in our marriage.”

Creditably, Bosworth stands as its only emotional lynchpin; her exasperation with her husband’s melancholic silence boils over into her eventually bursting into tears before him. Bosworth does well when playing Eva as someone under similar strains that all full-time carers undergo. One wonderful instance occurs when she finds herself again at McDonalds drive thru unable order yet another meal; she rolls up her window and screams in frustration only for Polish to break tension by making a cheap joke through the clerk who says: “Sorry, that’s not on the menu.”

One of main difficulties faced by faith-based movies like “90 Minutes in Heaven” is that they rely heavily on prayers acting as deus ex machinae. In real life what may appear miraculous can often be seen as lazy writing onscreen this concept is especially true in film. This movie features one key moment where prayer leads to a dead end instead of rescue. In answer Eva’s petition for help in respect of her husband, she sees a billboard for a personal injury lawyer played by Dwight Yoakam who appears as an extremely irritating cameo.

The mural there at the hospital cafeteria shows mountains and meadows through which they sit. In these scenes, Yoakam looks like a Hollywood cowboy in front of a matte painting with his ten-gallon hat which falls under the previous visually distinct polish film-making traditions. Needless to say, this lawyer is phony just like the fake background in that picture and Eva’s hopes are crushed. This movie could have used more conflict situations like this one quite honestly while its faith cannot be made stronger if it never gets tested.

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