Big Ass Spider!

Big Ass Spider!

Once again another bug versus human tale is told, this time lighting and sounds  in B movie style combined with ok humor and of course its at the Syfy channel!. I know Syfy think they’re all Machete and Michael Bay but Big Ass Spider is a buried in the pile of average that makes it forgettable. Mikey Mendez might have a vision but this film shows why sound effects and action directing are far more important than creative visions. Without an ounce of irony, this tongue in cheek film also has plenty of idiotic cheesy lines to entertain due to the pacing. I had a time.

Greg Grunberg (Heroes) plays the part of Alex an exterminator with a masochistic nature, accustomed to quivering old women who will not give him a moment in peace if they see any insects in the surroundings. After getting bitten by a brown recluse, he goes to the hospital where a recently deceased corpse is being wheeled into the morgue.

In it is a body with the body of an alien spider that is first canine in size then expands into a rampaging 100 ft. monster. Assisted by a Mexican security officer Jose (Lombardo Boyar), Alex confronts the mutant spider with an army major Ray Wise also trying hard to look important. Don’t sweat the details, it’s sufficient to say for all intents and purpose, it’s so.

As soon as Alex and Jose join forces, the movie turns into a ‘buddy comedy’ as identified by Evan in his review. And it is funny for real. Grunberg was blameless and was wonderful, we are all in his corner. Also, I like that he is fat. There is a deficiency of action heroes who have literally ‘weight’. His appearance as average America makes it easier to feel compassion for the character Alex. I mean, I am overweight so overweight people on screen is something I appreciate.

I don’t know who this Lombardo Boyar is, and why he is in these movies to be honest. I only know his voice acting is great, and makes the movies better. Jose appears as Alex’s straight man and remains hysterically bland throughout the skits, only mumbling deadpan lines. My favorite is the one with Alex and Jose in a hospital, trying to subdue a spider before it gets too big.

Actually, wait, what is it with little Mexican guys shrieking in fear over spiders that I find so amusing? He and Alex have many great comebacks, which were honestly the best parts of the movies. One can tell that their back and forth banter is actually the essence of the film.

Coming to something I touched upon earlier: the CGI is a bullshit. The spider looks like did it get animated in the Play Station 2 generation and let’s not even get started on the horrendously placed green screens. These were budgetary constraints, of course, and luckily the fact that the film is funny and has a good sense of humor over its poor visuals, helps the viewer out.

Big Ass Spider! does not belong in the same category as the classic slashers, but c’mon, at least it’s not an absurd film as seen in a plethora of typical Saturday night binge films. The film is honest. And it knows how you want your buddy comedy monster movies to be, and does not try to be anything else.

Special Features: The DVD is filled with extra bonuses, such as exclusive interviews with the cast and SXSW featurette, and some astounding extra on what is the real take of Greg Grunberg and Lombardo Boyar about their direction from Mike Mendez.

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