Snow Valley (2024)

Snow Valley Review

In the same way, cringey is the moment where Laura asks why they’re hearing gunshots after Heath locks Ed’s gun in a safe and makes a show of it, to which he replies “Yeah but not every gun on Earth.” Thanks for that, Heath. This scene would have been so much smoother had Heath just said “I did. Must not be his gun.” It feels like a rough draft sometimes, as I’ve mentioned.

Snow Valley is very short, around 70 minutes without the credits. But most of its limited time is spent waiting for something to happen. There’s probably a quarter hour devoted to hinting at Ed as the antagonist before an abrupt turn implies otherwise.

Also problematic: how plot developments are shoehorned in so the story can move forward. For example, we learn that Laura just so happens to study a very niche phenomenon in her Ph.D. program that gives her insight into the motivations of a mysterious character who will be introduced later on (I’ll keep it vague to avoid spoilers). But still — I’m expected to buy such an uncanny twist? What are the odds? Astronomical.

Similarly jarring, not long after Ed enters as red herring and brings with him the lore surrounding the lodge, he finds himself in a compromising position with Anna, who five minutes ago was professing deep-seated undying hatred for him. But during a couple unaccounted for minutes, she becomes comfortable enough with Ed to accept a naked chakra massage complete with sexy moaning noises that make everyone think they’re having sex — again, none of this was supported by anything that came before it; none of this makes any sense; this serves only to further the narrative in some fashion but that is the sole purpose of that development.

There are performances from some of the leads in Snow Valley. They are serviceable! Barbara Crampton is underutilized but it’s always nice seeing her do what she can with subpar material. The lodge set design does indeed set up location as very lodge-like, so there’s that.

Overall I can respect what Brandon Murphy was trying to do with his last film; there may have been some complications preventing him from making exactly what he wanted here but still — he made a feature! That alone puts him ahead of many aspiring screenwriters, myself included.

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